SUXBNME 1,458 Posted February 24, 2021 Sooo...Steel Panther wrote a song about Tiger quite awhile ago. Wanna hear it? Here it goes (NSFW...Boobage) L:yrics below...Seriously...Listen to the lyrics and understand how long ago this was. Fukkin perfect If you don't golf that's okay You can be a tiger anyway Lie through your teeth when things get tough Or your balls are gonna wind up in the rough, yeah yeah If you wanna be like Tiger Woods Fertilizing ladies in the neighborhood Get real rich and you will find All the hot chicks will want to grind If you wanna be like Tiger Woods Grip that shaft like you know you should Get a platinum card, it will be all good The girls will want you just like Tiger Woods Remember this when you're having fun Three holes are better than a hole in one, yeah If the word gets out don't be afraid When a nine iron's heading for your Escalade, yeah yeah If you wanna be like Tiger Woods Filling all the divots in the neighborhood Don't think about those three foot putts Cover your tracks when you're banging them sluts If you wanna be like Tiger Woods Text messages are never good Nail the girl at the driving range Your life will change, just like Tiger Woods Have your best friend book all your flights Tell your wife that you're golfing nights Get a call girl and maybe just chill Be willing to part with a hundred mil Bang a new porn star every day Tell your sponsors it will be okay Surprise them all with an invitation To a viewing of your first double penetration, yeah If you wanna be like Tiger Woods Poking all the holes in the neighborhood Tell your wife how it's gonna be Your driver is community property If you wanna be like Tiger Woods, Brett Favre did it, so you know you could! Become the king of your neighborhood Like Steel Panther and Tiger Woods Just like Tiger Woods! Oh yeah yeah 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KSB2424 3,148 Posted February 24, 2021 I love titties as much as the next guy, but that is juvenile. Now I will give two points for originality for the lyrics. Overall, C+ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JustinCharge 2,397 Posted February 24, 2021 8 hours ago, KSB2424 said: I think I'll wait before making any judgments. It was 7:12am. An animal could have run out in front of him, he could have just nodded off, it could be something related to his recent back surgery, it literally could be anything. Prayers up. I have seen coyotes up there. Pretty odd when you think about it because its totally surrounded by urban areas. But they are there. Its more rural up there with a golf course etc. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,458 Posted February 24, 2021 1 minute ago, KSB2424 said: I love titties as much as the next guy, but that is juvenile. Now I will give two points for originality for the lyrics. Overall, C+ Just a C+ ? Mebbe we just don't have the same musical tastes. Believe it or not, those freakshows are actually considered by real musicians as one of the most talented bands there are, even though they are by and large a "parody" band. On the other hand, KSB, I give you an A+ for actually watching it and giving your opinion on it. Also, I'm prolly as big of a Tiger fan as you are and todays news kinda hit me harder than it should have as I'm pretty sure it did you, too. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JustinCharge 2,397 Posted February 24, 2021 3 hours ago, wiffleball said: THIS is why Kobe used a helicopter. I was driving in Calabasas that morning maybe 2-3 hours before the Kobe crash maybe 1-2 miles from where he went down. The fog was thicker than I've ever seen. I literally could not see past the hood of my vehicle. It felt unsafe, I went home. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OldMaid 2,129 Posted February 24, 2021 4 hours ago, wiffleball said: THIS is why Kobe used a helicopter. This is why we you. End thread. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,458 Posted February 24, 2021 7 minutes ago, OldMaid said: This is why we you. End thread. Yep. He is a literary golden god more often than not Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gepetto 1,292 Posted February 24, 2021 Update on Tiger's condition: https://twitter.com/TigerWoods/status/1364447580520738820/photo/1 Also, I never had a Tiger Woods Rookie Card and was planning to buy one today before I knew about the accident. Not sure why I waited 20 years. Was planning to spend about $125 or so. Best I could do was $299. Cards on ebay were being sold either before or as I clicked on each listing. They tripled today in price. Oh well, got one now. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KSB2424 3,148 Posted February 24, 2021 5 hours ago, Gepetto said: Update on Tiger's condition: https://twitter.com/TigerWoods/status/1364447580520738820/photo/1 Also, I never had a Tiger Woods Rookie Card and was planning to buy one today before I knew about the accident. Not sure why I waited 20 years. Was planning to spend about $125 or so. Best I could do was $299. Cards on ebay were being sold either before or as I clicked on each listing. They tripled today in price. Oh well, got one now. Fock. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bandrus1 413 Posted February 24, 2021 6 hours ago, Gepetto said: Update on Tiger's condition: https://twitter.com/TigerWoods/status/1364447580520738820/photo/1 Also, I never had a Tiger Woods Rookie Card and was planning to buy one today before I knew about the accident. Not sure why I waited 20 years. Was planning to spend about $125 or so. Best I could do was $299. Cards on ebay were being sold either before or as I clicked on each listing. They tripled today in price. Oh well, got one now. I was in a small shop the other day and a guy in the shop has a black lable woods rookie. Needs to sell asap Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Utilit99 4,099 Posted February 24, 2021 Opinions and speculation are not wanted on this earth. It should be illegal because they hurt a bunch of pansy liberals. What's wrong with saying "I'm not surprised"? Jeez. CNN sports anchor Andy Scholes was forced to walk back remarks he made on air Tuesday after golf star Tiger Woods was injured in a car wreck. Scholes appeared on the cable network to weigh in on the accident shortly after news broke that a car driven by Woods had tumbled off a steep road in Rancho Palos Verdes, California. With little information available about the accident, Scholes speculated that the sports legend's past use of painkillers may have had something to do with the accident "What are your thoughts right now?" CNN anchor Brianna Keilar asked Scholes. "I mean, Brianna, you know, stunned I guess but not entirely surprised by what we're seeing here," he answered. "You know, Tiger in 2017 was found by police pulled over on the side of the road asleep in his car. He had said he had taken a lot of painkillers at that time, because we all know Tiger has gone under a lot of surgeries over the years and painkillers have become part of his life." "You should not have the platform to communicate with others..." https://www.foxnews.com/media/cnn-sports-anchor-andy-scholes-tiger-woods-car-wreck-painkillers Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Alias Detective 1,389 Posted February 24, 2021 2 minutes ago, Utilit99 said: Opinions and speculation are not wanted on this earth. It should be illegal because they hurt a bunch of pansy liberals. What's wrong with saying "I'm not surprised"? Jeez. CNN sports anchor Andy Scholes was forced to walk back remarks he made on air Tuesday after golf star Tiger Woods was injured in a car wreck. Scholes appeared on the cable network to weigh in on the accident shortly after news broke that a car driven by Woods had tumbled off a steep road in Rancho Palos Verdes, California. With little information available about the accident, Scholes speculated that the sports legend's past use of painkillers may have had something to do with the accident "What are your thoughts right now?" CNN anchor Brianna Keilar asked Scholes. "I mean, Brianna, you know, stunned I guess but not entirely surprised by what we're seeing here," he answered. "You know, Tiger in 2017 was found by police pulled over on the side of the road asleep in his car. He had said he had taken a lot of painkillers at that time, because we all know Tiger has gone under a lot of surgeries over the years and painkillers have become part of his life." https://www.foxnews.com/media/cnn-sports-anchor-andy-scholes-tiger-woods-car-wreck-painkillers You bitc# about everything. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Utilit99 4,099 Posted February 24, 2021 8 minutes ago, Alias Detective said: You bitc# about everything. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bandrus1 413 Posted February 24, 2021 16 minutes ago, Alias Detective said: You bitc# about everything. Definitely true Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Utilit99 4,099 Posted February 24, 2021 39 minutes ago, bandrus1 said: Definitely true Look at the whiners whining about someone getting accosted by liberals for some kind of perceived "hate speech" and told he should no longer be able to communicate with others. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kopy 559 Posted February 24, 2021 8 hours ago, KSB2424 said: I love titties as much as the next guy, but that is juvenile. Now I will give two points for originality for the lyrics. Overall, C+ The only reason I looked was because I was promised titties. It was worth my time. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NorthernVike 2,083 Posted February 24, 2021 Has his head feld off yet? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gepetto 1,292 Posted February 24, 2021 2 hours ago, bandrus1 said: I was in a small shop the other day and a guy in the shop has a black lable woods rookie. Needs to sell asap Yea now is the time to sell that for a shop. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Hand 482 Posted February 24, 2021 14 hours ago, KSB2424 said: I kinda like HT. To each their own I guess. I wasn’t referring to HT. I apologize Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gladiators 1,964 Posted February 24, 2021 Fock COVID!!!!!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bert 1,128 Posted February 24, 2021 Maybe they will put a number 3 on the side of the scooter he uses to cruz around the Masters. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rusty Syringes 478 Posted February 24, 2021 The leg injuries sound so bad that I can't imagine he'll be playing at the Masters again. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Fireballer 2,639 Posted February 24, 2021 He should see Alex Smiths doctors ASAP. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GobbleDog 985 Posted February 24, 2021 20 hours ago, Hardcore troubadour said: He was going too fast. Good enough for me. You think the car just went into a ditch by itself? A kid chasing a ball ran into the road? I’ll go ahead and make the call that it was his fault. Tiger is one of ??? 40% ??? of drivers on the road today who absolutely suck at driving. Too fast, too close, no attention. Slow - defensive drivers never end up in that ditch. A rural, lightly traveled, 4-lane, divided road... on a clear day. I'd have to blow three tires, while a monster truck and semi cut me off simultaneously for that to possibly happen. Even then, no. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
edjr 6,578 Posted April 1, 2021 Boy it pays to be rich and a celebrity The cause of Tiger Woods' crash has been determined but details yet to be released publicly https://edition.cnn.com/2021/04/01/golf/tiger-woods-police-crash-investigation-spt-intl/index.html Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bostonlager 2,664 Posted April 1, 2021 Did it on purpose. Trying to play the Augusta in the sky. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
edjr 6,578 Posted April 1, 2021 1 minute ago, bostonlager said: Did it on purpose. Trying to play the Augusta in the sky. There was no breaking or skid marks. Dude passed out or fell asleep Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bostonlager 2,664 Posted April 1, 2021 9 minutes ago, edjr said: There was no breaking or skid marks. Dude passed out or fell asleep 1. Passed out 2. Fell asleep 3. Tried to kill himself 4. Playing with his phone I don't see any other options. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hardcore troubadour 14,966 Posted April 1, 2021 Ambien. Mix race privilege. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bostonlager 2,664 Posted April 1, 2021 The Asian half of TW could just be a shittty driver like the rest of them. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
edjr 6,578 Posted April 1, 2021 4 minutes ago, bostonlager said: 1. Passed out 2. Fell asleep 3. Tried to kill himself 4. Playing with his phone I don't see any other options. Even if you are on your phone, you would hit the breaks before hitting a tree Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
edjr 6,578 Posted April 1, 2021 1 minute ago, bostonlager said: The Asian half of TW could just be a shittty driver like the rest of them. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BeenHereBefore 1,471 Posted April 1, 2021 Chris explains Tigers wreck. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Reality 3,106 Posted April 1, 2021 Definitely passed out, asleep, whatever. Thankfully nobody else was involved. I don't really need to know the details, dude was an absolute trainwreck on TV the day before. That was all I needed to see to know what happened. It's Pills, it's always been the pills and self medicating the pain. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
edjr 6,578 Posted April 1, 2021 14 minutes ago, Reality said: Definitely passed out, asleep, whatever. Thankfully nobody else was involved. I don't really need to know the details, dude was an absolute trainwreck on TV the day before. That was all I needed to see to know what happened. It's Pills, it's always been the pills and self medicating the pain. +1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cruzer 1,995 Posted April 1, 2021 42 minutes ago, Reality said: Definitely passed out, asleep, whatever. Thankfully nobody else was involved. I don't really need to know the details, dude was an absolute trainwreck on TV the day before. That was all I needed to see to know what happened. It's Pills, it's always been the pills and self medicating the pain. He literally looked like a Disney character or something. I was like, wow - wtf? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
edjr 6,578 Posted April 1, 2021 3 minutes ago, Cruzer said: He literally looked like a Disney character or something. I was like, wow - wtf? High AF. Fallin asleep at the mic, forget the wheel Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheNewGirl 1,357 Posted April 1, 2021 yeah, I too think it's always been pills. Poor guy. Hope he gets help. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cruzer 1,995 Posted April 1, 2021 14 minutes ago, edjr said: High AF. Fallin asleep at the mic, forget the wheel Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Fireballer 2,639 Posted April 7, 2021 Looks like the Big Cat was testing out the high speed handling of his SUV Share this post Link to post Share on other sites