Your first fist fight.....

[cyclone24 1,814]

This might be interesting....

 

Think i was in 5th grade....me and another kid had been jawing all recess, teachers broke it up, we went back at each other just talking. Get back to class we are still at it.

 

Teacher says...Matt...Paul come up to the front of class (we sheepishly go up)....ok if you two want to fight so bad..go ahead...right here

 

We took one look at each other and started throwing...haha....im guessing she didnt expect us to go.

 

BUT...hes been my best friend for over 30 years now.

[shotsup 832]

He messed with my sister. He ended up a bloody mess.

[Hardcore troubadour 12,652]

1972. His father supported Nixon, my father supported MCGovern. It was on. He grew up to be a chief of police. Sadly passed away a couple of years ago. Good guy. RIP Kevin.

[Brad GLuckman 518]

I banged some wh0re. Her brother turned me into a bloody mess.

[wiffleball 4,640]

I did a lot more damage than was intended.

 

Two brothers. Im palling with the younger one. Probably 7th grade. Older brother and his ghey mutt start messing with young brother.

 

Ended up being one of those guys only kind of fights. it, it was summer we were bored we're testing out our muscles. The two brothers go after it, the mutt comes after me mostly out of a sense of obligation. Sort of like dancing with the ugly girl while the other two danced.- just because it'd be weird not to.

 

He's a putz, I'm not interested, he's not eager. The other to beat the out of each other. We all have to walk back the same direction so it's not too dramatic. We walked down Kennedy Street which for little kids had a pretty steep angle. Me and the brother go down first . we're about halfway down the street. I'm guessing older brother is giving the mutt schitt for not getting enough licks on me. So these two come trotting down the street and the mutt literally throws a glancing punch at my cheek as he's running by. It's a pansy girl move no matter what. Hit and Run? On a kid 2 or 3 years younger than you? Homo.

 

I'd love to say I did this on purpose, but it was mostly just reaction. He runs by my right side throws his faggety little punch and literally the same time I slide my right leg out laterally he trips over it. Remember it's a steep decline. He hits the pavement does some serious road rash from forehead to knees.

 

We haul ass back to my house. Eventually, parents get involved. The mutt looks like he got hit by a bus. I got in trouble. But everybody knew the score. I was younger and smaller. And I swear to God I think it's the first time my dad gave me that look like I'm going to have to punish you because of the wife, but he was secretly proud of me.

 

Didn't really have the heart to break it to him that we just Tangled legs and gravity kicked his ass. LOL

[Hardcore troubadour 12,652]

I only got half way through wiffles post. Was he talking about his first fight or the first time he got laid by a guy?

[Gepetto 988]

Punched the d-bag who lived across the street, probably 7th grade. One punch by me. Black eye for him. He told kids at school he got it from a door knob at home accidentally fell into it or something. He's still a huge d-bag.

[wiffleball 4,640]

I only got half way through wiffles post. Was he talking about his first fight or the first time he got laid by a guy?

It is a tip that those are usually concurrent.

[Brad GLuckman 518]

I only got half way through wiffles post. Was he talking about his first fight or the first time he got laid by a guy?

Ya it was definitely about his first gay experience. I stopped after this because I just felt dirty.

 

Me and the brother go down first . we're about halfway down the street. I'm guessing older brother is giving the mutt schitt for not getting enough licks on me.

[wiffleball 4,640]

You guys obviously never saw Brokeback Mountain. It starts off as a fight, then morphs into a struggle cuddle, then the next thing you know, we can't quit each other.

 

But I still kick his ass afterwards. Cuz I'm not a homo or anything.

[Brad GLuckman 518]

You guys obviously never saw Brokeback Mountain. It starts off as a fight, then morphs into a struggle cuddle, then the next thing you know, we can't quit each other.

 

But I still kick his ass afterwards. Cuz I'm not a homo or anything.

[shotsup 832]

He didn't bang her. He smacked her around. Was it still you ?

[shotsup 832]

I only got half way through wiffles post. Was he talking about his first fight or the first time he got laid by a guy?

tl;dr

[nzoner 936]

Stepbrother hit my mother which led to a small fight between us.Later that night when his dad got home from work he got his ass beat and good.

[5-Points 2,729]

4th grade. Me and another kid got into an argument at recess which the "Yard Duty" promptly broke up. He told me he was going to kick my @ss after school. When school let out I looked all over for him but couldn't find him so I started walking home. All of a sudden I see him getting a ride home on the back of another kid's bike. So I yell "Hey John, I thought you said you were gonna kick my @ss after school, poosay!" Then he jumped off the bike and kicked my @ss.

[shotsup 832]

[Hardcore troubadour 12,652]

Digby often fights with the truth. Usually loses.

[fandandy 3,311]

4th grade. Me and another kid got into an argument at recess which the "Yard Duty" promptly broke up. He told me he was going to kick my @ss after school. When school let out I looked all over for him but couldn't find him so I started walking home. All of a sudden I see him getting a ride home on the back of another kid's bike. So I yell "Hey John, I thought you said you were gonna kick my @ss after school, poosay!" Then he jumped off the bike and kicked my @ss.

Hilarious. I was prolly in the 3rd grade maybe and it was the end of winter where it wasn't too cold but still damp and this kid was out on recess dressed like the little brother in A Christmas Story. I found that funny so I decided to tease him. I would run past him and push him, back and forth I went, pass after pass just focking with this poor kid for no other reason than I was a dickhead. He finally timed his swing just right and the next pass I made he clocked me right in the face and down I went, crying like a little girl. All the kids laughed at me.

 

That was it for me. I'm obviously not much for fighting so I never fought again.

[Bier Meister 1,514]

pretty young.... do not remember. i was scrappy until i was about 16-17.

[MTSkiBum 1,594]

I have never been in a fight.

[the s is ilent 69]

Dad told me this story about the time he challenged his father.

 

" there were two blows laid. He hit me and I hit the floor"

[Gepetto 988]

You guys obviously never saw Brokeback Mountain. It starts off as a fight, then morphs into a struggle cuddle, then the next thing you know, we can't quit each other.

 

But I still kick his ass afterwards. Cuz I'm not a homo or anything.

 

That looks like his balls resting on your chin emoji!

[Reality 2,710]

Had 2 younger brothers, we are all a total of 3 years apart. A week wouldn't go by without a good fist fight, all the way through high school. Good times.

[Bier Meister 1,514]

Had 2 younger brothers, we are all a total of 3 years apart. A week wouldn't go by without a good fist fight, all the way through high school. Good times.

 

my oldest friend has 2 older brothers. we were all about a year apart: my friend, myself, his middle brother, his oldest brother. over the years there would be different alliances. they also had misc weapons that would sometime become involved in melees (bb guns, dart guns, wrist rockets, etc)

[wiffleball 4,640]

 

That looks like his balls resting on your chin emoji!

Dude, not even close.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It's his splooge.

[Djgb13 2,338]

Sh1t u was prettty young. Definitely 1st grade or younger. I just remember it was at daycare.

[MDC 5,892]

Earliest one I can remember was in middle school. Ive been in very few fights in my life.

[Frozenbeernuts 1,652]

I only got half way through wiffles post. Was he talking about his first fight or the first time he got laid by a guy?

Both. Where a lot of guys become buddies after a fight, wiffle becomes butt buddies

[tanatastic 2,061]

2nd grade I hit a girl in the gut for taking my skipping rock. She told on me and I got in trouble. Havent hit anyone since.

[Cloaca du jour 2,064]

I took on like 65 5 yr olds but got tired and one of them kicked me on the balls

[5-Points 2,729]

Hilarious. I was prolly in the 3rd grade maybe and it was the end of winter where it wasn't too cold but still damp and this kid was out on recess dressed like the little brother in A Christmas Story. I found that funny so I decided to tease him. I would run past him and push him, back and forth I went, pass after pass just focking with this poor kid for no other reason than I was a dickhead. He finally timed his swing just right and the next pass I made he clocked me right in the face and down I went, crying like a little girl. All the kids laughed at me.

 

That was it for me. I'm obviously not much for fighting so I never fought again.

We could be such ass holes as kids, couldn't we?

 

I got in plenty of fights after that. Won some, lost some. But that was the day I learned that running your mouth had consequences.

[mmmmm...beer 691]

But that was the day I learned that running your mouth had consequences.

This... this is whats missing now. For thousands of years untold this is how we has hoomans learned our place in the world. Go beyond your place in life you got a good slap or sock in the nose.

 

Oh fock... maybe I shouldn't do that...

[Gladiators 1,904]

I only fight old women or small children. I have never lost.

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,432]

I don't remember the first one. I was probably young, but there haven't been a ton. Maybe 10 in my life. Haven't had one in probably 25 years and hopefully don't have another, although I hear the old age homes can get rough.

[drobeski 3,061]

Was his last

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

Was probably 10. Some kid at daycare was throwing rocks at my little sister. My brother and I jumped on him and started pounding.

 

They called dad at work, and he had to come get us. The lady was ranting. Dad stopped her, looked at us all angry, and asked why. We told him.

 

Good job boys, go get in the car, well go get ice cream.

 

He and the daycare lady had it out. We went back the next day, was never spoken of again.

[edjr 5,567]

never

[Kanil 519]

I was in 5th grade. My brother was a year younger than I am and I walked around a corner outside of the school to see a group of kids around him picking on him. When I jumped in and told them to leave him alone, one of the kids swung at me and hit me in the shoulder. I picked up a rock and hit him in the head with it. My brother took off running and got a teacher. I ended up getting in trouble.

[IMMensaMind 459]

4th grade. Largest girl in class. Knocked me down; bounced my head off the cloakroom floor a time or two, hit me in the nose drawing blood. I only vaguely remember it now, but I remember feeling unable to fight back because it was a girl.

 

Turns out she had a crush on me. Da fuq?

 

Next fight was better: 6th grade. Black kid who had been pestering me for a while. Playground confrontation: he swung first & missed, and I tackled him and got him in a headlock. I remember that well, because it turns out that holding a black kid with a greasy 'fro in a headlock is not at all easy to do, and I lost the grip. He got to his feet and charged me, and I dodged it and tripped him and landed on his back, and somehow got both his arms stuck behind his neck in a something like a full nelson until the teacher came to separate us.

 

But not before he squealed like a focking little girl.

[Cloaca du jour 2,064]

I remember trying a spinning backfist and failing miserably. Two nerds fighting.. was more like two windmills fighting. Dont think anyone really landed a punch...we just got tired. Hahahaha